The difference a week of sleep training makes! This is the first time we have ever had any sort of progress with teaching Nolan to nap. Night sleep is still totally hit and miss, but I'm okay with dealing with that later (soon). My prime concern was getting him to accept that during the day, sleep=good and we're headed in the right direction. It's not great, but there is some real improvement.
The first couple days last week, Nolan would fuss and cry longer than he'd actually sleep at nap times, and he required a few stroller walks to sneak in a cat nap so that we could get through the day. This is classic Nolan. The change after one week? Yesterday (which I'm sure is exceptional), he had minimal fussing/crying and actually managed to sleep about 1.5 hours TWICE in one day. The change in this baby is amazing! He's happy, he's smiley, and he actually enjoys play time.
It really goes to show how important it is to be well rested. He still likes and wants to fall asleep while nursing, but I've cut that out completely - even at night time. The key really is that he needed to learn to put himself to sleep without any help from me. The added bonus, which I'm surprised to see after just a week, is that he's been able to go back down by himself when he wakes after a sleep cycle. He doesn't do it every time, but there have been a few instances where he'll be asleep for 30-40 minutes, he will cry out briefly, and then it's quiet again. HUGE success in my opinion.
Nights are going to be the next conquest. He did STTN 3 times in a row at the beginning of last week, when we first started sleep training. I didn't think it was going to be a sure thing then, and I still don't think it will be now -- until I crack down on it. His most recent schtick is that he wakes around 9:30-11:30pm and 1:30-4:00am and wants to nurse. I've been going in to top him up because, frankly, it's easier to nurse him for 10 minutes and go back to bed than it is to listen to him scream for an hour or more, twice a night. Once I feel that nap times are consistently going well, I'll tackle the night waking. For now though, all my concentration is going to naps.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Days 4 & 5
Morning naps are definitely not as consistent as I'd hoped they would be at this point. I wasn't expecting any miracles, but it would be nice if he slept longer than he cried.
Day 4
4:00 awake, nurse
4:15 into crib awake
6:30 awake. Nurse in bed
8:47 nurse in glider
8:45 Into crib awake, fuss
9:21 Asleep
9:55 awake, cry
1010 out of bed
12:58 nurse in glider
1:07 into crib awake
1:24 asleep
2:25 had to wake him
6:30 asleep
10:30 awake, cry, nurse
10:45 in crib awake
Nap #1: took 26 mins to fall asleep, slept 34 mins
Nap #2: took 17 mins to fall asleep, slept 61 mins before I had to wake him (which I HATE! Need to find an alternate way to get Mason home after school)
Bedtime: he goes to sleep fairly easily at night, but the 10:30 waking was not impressive. I fed him, but I don't want to keep this up for long. I want him to sleep longer stretches at night!
Day 5
5:30 awake, nurse in bed, sleep
6:50 awake
8:40 nurse in glider
8:49 into crib awake, fuss
9:07 asleep
9:50 cry out once, (back to sleep?)
10:00 awake
1:10 nursed, into crib awake, cry fuss
135 asleep
2:53 awake
Super fussy all afternoon
5:45 MELTDOWN
5:54 nurse
6:10 In crib
9:40 awake (quiet on own)
10:30 awake (quiet on his own)
Nap #1: took 18 mins to fall asleep, slept 59 or 69 mins (depending on if he stayed awake after that cry out or if he snoozed a bit more after
Nap #2: took 25 mins to fall asleep, slept 1h18m (this was a good nap!)
Bedtime: easy, and this time, even though he seemed to wake twice, he put himself back to sleep easily both times.
Issues:
Trying to get Nolan to sleep before 1pm for his afternoon nap is pretty pointless. 1pm seems to be the magic time for him to go to sleep so trying prior to that just increases the time he spends crying because he isn't ready yet. But, because Mason's school is out at 2:30, this means I have to wake Nolan to go get him. It's so counter productive! Here I am trying to encourage this little baby to sleep and then I have to interrupt him the off time he actually does what I want him too. I need to find someone to walk Mason home for me.
Day 4
4:00 awake, nurse
4:15 into crib awake
6:30 awake. Nurse in bed
8:47 nurse in glider
8:45 Into crib awake, fuss
9:21 Asleep
9:55 awake, cry
1010 out of bed
12:58 nurse in glider
1:07 into crib awake
1:24 asleep
2:25 had to wake him
6:30 asleep
10:30 awake, cry, nurse
10:45 in crib awake
Nap #1: took 26 mins to fall asleep, slept 34 mins
Nap #2: took 17 mins to fall asleep, slept 61 mins before I had to wake him (which I HATE! Need to find an alternate way to get Mason home after school)
Bedtime: he goes to sleep fairly easily at night, but the 10:30 waking was not impressive. I fed him, but I don't want to keep this up for long. I want him to sleep longer stretches at night!
Day 5
5:30 awake, nurse in bed, sleep
6:50 awake
8:40 nurse in glider
8:49 into crib awake, fuss
9:07 asleep
9:50 cry out once, (back to sleep?)
10:00 awake
1:10 nursed, into crib awake, cry fuss
135 asleep
2:53 awake
Super fussy all afternoon
5:45 MELTDOWN
5:54 nurse
6:10 In crib
9:40 awake (quiet on own)
10:30 awake (quiet on his own)
Nap #1: took 18 mins to fall asleep, slept 59 or 69 mins (depending on if he stayed awake after that cry out or if he snoozed a bit more after
Nap #2: took 25 mins to fall asleep, slept 1h18m (this was a good nap!)
Bedtime: easy, and this time, even though he seemed to wake twice, he put himself back to sleep easily both times.
Issues:
Trying to get Nolan to sleep before 1pm for his afternoon nap is pretty pointless. 1pm seems to be the magic time for him to go to sleep so trying prior to that just increases the time he spends crying because he isn't ready yet. But, because Mason's school is out at 2:30, this means I have to wake Nolan to go get him. It's so counter productive! Here I am trying to encourage this little baby to sleep and then I have to interrupt him the off time he actually does what I want him too. I need to find someone to walk Mason home for me.
Friday, November 16, 2012
Day 3
I'm starting to see a pattern forming with Nolan. (Although, sleep habits with him are so sporadic that it probably won't be a pattern for long.)
-He wakes for the day between 6:15 and 6:45
-Nap #1 is as early as I can get it, in the ball park of 9am, and he makes the least fuss at this nap
-Nap #2 is a freaking gong show
-Bedtime is the easiest part of my day with him
Here's how Day 3 (yesterday) went:
Day 3 -STTN
6:30 wake up, nurse in bed, doze
7:10 awake
9:24 into crib awake, babble, fuss, cry
9:39 asleep
10:07 cry out (end of sleep cycle?)
10:10 asleep (good boy!!)
10:56 up
12:40 nurse in glider
12:48 crib, awake cry, fuss, babble
2 o'clock out of the crib
220 into stroller
255 asleep
3:25 awake
6:40into crib awake
6:45 asleep
Another night of Sleeping through the Night for Nolan! I think that made 3 in a row. Awesome. I'm still not holding out any hope that this really will be the start of him consistently STTN.
One small victory for Nolan yesterday was that he seemed to put himself back to sleep after waking after his first sleep cycle. This is H.U.G.E for him. Prior to jumping on the official sleep training bandwagon, he would nap 30 minutes exactly and then cry and I'd have to get him up. This told me that he would go through one sleep cycle and then wouldn't be able to get himself back to sleep to continue the nap. But, 3 days into being put to bed awake seems to have started to help him with that. Even if it's a one-off, at least I know that he's capable.
The second nap was non-existant. I got him into his crib after being awake only 1 hour and 48 minutes, so I thought I had the timing right. But, he cried, fussed and babbled for a while and then just all-out screamed for the rest of a solid hour. Someone knocked on the door at that point so I just got him up. I put him in the stroller to go get Mason from school and he fell asleep sometime around 2:55 (not sure exactly what time because I just happened to look in on him and he was out. I figure he had at least a 30min catnap in the stroller. Not great, but I suppose it got us through.
Bedtime was easy as always :)
-He wakes for the day between 6:15 and 6:45
-Nap #1 is as early as I can get it, in the ball park of 9am, and he makes the least fuss at this nap
-Nap #2 is a freaking gong show
-Bedtime is the easiest part of my day with him
Here's how Day 3 (yesterday) went:
Day 3 -STTN
6:30 wake up, nurse in bed, doze
7:10 awake
9:24 into crib awake, babble, fuss, cry
9:39 asleep
10:07 cry out (end of sleep cycle?)
10:10 asleep (good boy!!)
10:56 up
12:40 nurse in glider
12:48 crib, awake cry, fuss, babble
2 o'clock out of the crib
220 into stroller
255 asleep
3:25 awake
6:40into crib awake
6:45 asleep
Another night of Sleeping through the Night for Nolan! I think that made 3 in a row. Awesome. I'm still not holding out any hope that this really will be the start of him consistently STTN.
One small victory for Nolan yesterday was that he seemed to put himself back to sleep after waking after his first sleep cycle. This is H.U.G.E for him. Prior to jumping on the official sleep training bandwagon, he would nap 30 minutes exactly and then cry and I'd have to get him up. This told me that he would go through one sleep cycle and then wouldn't be able to get himself back to sleep to continue the nap. But, 3 days into being put to bed awake seems to have started to help him with that. Even if it's a one-off, at least I know that he's capable.
The second nap was non-existant. I got him into his crib after being awake only 1 hour and 48 minutes, so I thought I had the timing right. But, he cried, fussed and babbled for a while and then just all-out screamed for the rest of a solid hour. Someone knocked on the door at that point so I just got him up. I put him in the stroller to go get Mason from school and he fell asleep sometime around 2:55 (not sure exactly what time because I just happened to look in on him and he was out. I figure he had at least a 30min catnap in the stroller. Not great, but I suppose it got us through.
Bedtime was easy as always :)
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Day 2
Day 2 (yesterday) didn't go toooo badly. I always expect the worst out of Nolan; that way, if he actually manages to sleep more than 5 minutes a day, I'm pleasantly surprised!
Here's yesterday's log:
6:30 awake, nurse in bed
7:00 out of bed, bum change, play, eat, drop kids at school
8:40 nurse in glider
8:50 into crib awake, brief cry, babbling
9:13 asleep
10:36 awake
12:40 nurse in glider
12:53 into crib awake, fuss
1:20 asleep
1:37 awake, cry
1:57 up, nurse on couch
3:45 asleep in stroller
4:15 up
6:40 in crib, babbling
6:50 asleep.
(Slept through the night! Second night in a row. WOW.)
I think the key here is getting him into his crib for naps *early*. He doesn't seem to do so well with being up more than 2 hours in the morning and probably 3 hours between when naps #1 and #2 should be. The morning nap was 1h23m! Yay Nolan :) This is huge for us.
Afternoon nap... eh, not so hot. He cried for 27m and then only slept for 13m THIS is typical Nolan. I did let him cry in his crib for 20 mins and at that point it seemed pretty clear that he wasn't going to sleep longer, so I got him up. I put him in the stroller and we walked to pick Mason up from school. He managed another 30m catnap which isn't great in the big picture, but it helps us limp through the day and get to bedtime without an atomic meltdown.
Bedtime was fine - thank goodness we already went through the hard part of doing that at 4 months. He was in bed awake by 6:40 and babbled to himself a bit. He was out by 6:50 and slept solidly until 6:30am today! That's TWO nights of sleeping through. Amazing for this household!
*Extra bonus: There were no nightmares or peeing the bed from the older two, so Matt and I truly did SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT. Without a word of a lie, I can't remember the last time this happened. I'd put money on it that it hasn't happened in 8 months.
Here's yesterday's log:
6:30 awake, nurse in bed
7:00 out of bed, bum change, play, eat, drop kids at school
8:40 nurse in glider
8:50 into crib awake, brief cry, babbling
9:13 asleep
10:36 awake
12:40 nurse in glider
12:53 into crib awake, fuss
1:20 asleep
1:37 awake, cry
1:57 up, nurse on couch
3:45 asleep in stroller
4:15 up
6:40 in crib, babbling
6:50 asleep.
(Slept through the night! Second night in a row. WOW.)
I think the key here is getting him into his crib for naps *early*. He doesn't seem to do so well with being up more than 2 hours in the morning and probably 3 hours between when naps #1 and #2 should be. The morning nap was 1h23m! Yay Nolan :) This is huge for us.
Afternoon nap... eh, not so hot. He cried for 27m and then only slept for 13m THIS is typical Nolan. I did let him cry in his crib for 20 mins and at that point it seemed pretty clear that he wasn't going to sleep longer, so I got him up. I put him in the stroller and we walked to pick Mason up from school. He managed another 30m catnap which isn't great in the big picture, but it helps us limp through the day and get to bedtime without an atomic meltdown.
Bedtime was fine - thank goodness we already went through the hard part of doing that at 4 months. He was in bed awake by 6:40 and babbled to himself a bit. He was out by 6:50 and slept solidly until 6:30am today! That's TWO nights of sleeping through. Amazing for this household!
*Extra bonus: There were no nightmares or peeing the bed from the older two, so Matt and I truly did SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT. Without a word of a lie, I can't remember the last time this happened. I'd put money on it that it hasn't happened in 8 months.
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Day 1 - Recap
Day 1 was not unlike most other days where I struggle to make Nolan nap. He cried for +/- 30 minutes for his first nap and slept about 30 minutes. As per SS, I left him to fuss for 10 minutes before going in to try to settle him. I picked him up and used the "key words" ("night-night time"), rubbed his back and then set him back down in the crib. Of course, this resulted in an unholy eruption from the poor little dude... Pretty much the same thing happened for his second nap. Bedtime was stellar, like usual (no sarcasm!). He nurses to sleep in the glider and I put him in the crib without a peep.
So, it was good that it only took 30 minutes of crying for him to fall asleep at each nap. BUT, it's not so good that he only sleeps 30 minutes at each nap.
Following the suggestion of going in to see if I can get him to sleep more after 10-15 minutes of crying just *doesn't* seem like it would ever work for this kid. It pisses him off big time. It's like I'm dangling a carrot.
Here's what I'm most conflicted about: to nurse at sleep times, or not to nurse at sleep times? SS instructs that feedings should be done upon waking and that it should not be part of the bedtime or naptime routine. BUT, after having done CIO at 4 months, and having it be successful for nighttime sleep, we still nurse right before bed. Sometimes he conks out on the nursing pillow and goes into the crib without a peep. Sometimes he kicks around and plays the whole time he's nursing and he goes into the crib awake. Those times he'll usually fuss (but not actually cry) a minute or two, but then goes to sleep.
So, do I keep up with the nursing before sleep part, and just use the rest of the strategies? Or, do I stop nursing at sleep times (which will cause upheaval at bedtime, for sure) and start everything 100% at square one?
I'm stuck on that.
So, it was good that it only took 30 minutes of crying for him to fall asleep at each nap. BUT, it's not so good that he only sleeps 30 minutes at each nap.
Following the suggestion of going in to see if I can get him to sleep more after 10-15 minutes of crying just *doesn't* seem like it would ever work for this kid. It pisses him off big time. It's like I'm dangling a carrot.
Here's what I'm most conflicted about: to nurse at sleep times, or not to nurse at sleep times? SS instructs that feedings should be done upon waking and that it should not be part of the bedtime or naptime routine. BUT, after having done CIO at 4 months, and having it be successful for nighttime sleep, we still nurse right before bed. Sometimes he conks out on the nursing pillow and goes into the crib without a peep. Sometimes he kicks around and plays the whole time he's nursing and he goes into the crib awake. Those times he'll usually fuss (but not actually cry) a minute or two, but then goes to sleep.
So, do I keep up with the nursing before sleep part, and just use the rest of the strategies? Or, do I stop nursing at sleep times (which will cause upheaval at bedtime, for sure) and start everything 100% at square one?
I'm stuck on that.
Let's Get Started
After almost 8 months of sleepless nights and days with nearly no breaks at all, it's time to just bite the bullet. I need to teach this kid to sleep. So why blog about it? Because I think (hope) that if I write it all down, and make an effort to do so each day, maybe it will hold me accountable and help me keep at it. Knowing other people may be reading about it will help me keep going. Or, that's the idea anyhow...
A little background: Nolan will be 8 months old on November 22nd and other than the odd surprise nap or 6 hour stretch of night sleep, he has never been a good sleeper. I don't know why, but he has never responded well when I've tried to get him sleeping well. We did the "Cry it Out" method at 4 months old and because before that point, he would need to be bounced on the yoga ball to fall asleep and it would take for.ev.er to get him there. He would sleep exclusively in the swing and even that was beginning not to work anymore. So, CIO we did, and after a couple weeks, I could nurse him and put him in his crib without him crying and carrying on. So, getting him to bed became a lot easier, but he still woke up every 2-3 hours through the night.
After reading 'Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child' cover to cover several times, I have followed the methods to a 'T'. I've tried CIO for naps on several different occasions, giving it a good 2 weeks to get him to figure it out, and not once has it ever worked. Maybe Dr. Weissbluth's version of CIO for naps just doesn't work for this little dude. I've recently re-read 'Sleep Sense' which also uses a form of CIO, but the delivery is a little different. I'm going to try going with her method this time around.
So, here we are. Day 1.
Sleep Sense heavily suggests that you keep your baby in his crib for all naps during the training period so that they have a chance to figure out and realize that crib=sleep. It makes perfect sense to me and in a perfect world, that's what I would do, but I have two other kids who need to be dropped off and picked up from school and, as Murphy's Law states, prime nap times fall exactly during those drop offs and pick ups. So, I was going to wait to do this sleep training thing until Christmas break because the kids are off school for 2 weeks (TWO WEEKS?! WTF is that about?) this year and I wouldn't have to run around during nap times. But, after one more night of being up every 2 hours last night, I woke up this morning determined to just do the best I can and get things rolling TODAY. The lack of sleep and perma-grumpy baby around here is weighing on me heavily and I can't take it one more day, much less one more month until Break starts.
So, this morning I loaded up all three kids and dropped Mason off at school. Then we drove and drove to kill time (and try to get Nolan to nap - no dice) and then dropped Jaime at preschool. Nolan and I came straight home, nursed in the glider and I put him in his crib awake at 9:33am. It's now 9:59am and he's been crying the entire time. It kills me to hear him cry. Seriously grates on my nerves and makes me doubt myself every.single.time. We've got to power through this time though! This HAS to work. He HAS to learn that sleep and naps are a really good thing.
Sleep Sense (which will forever after be referred to as "SS" because I'm tired of typing it out already) allows for you to go in and check on your baby as often as you think he needs it. I haven't gone in yet because I think that my presence will just piss him off and make him cry harder. I don't think I'll tempt that fate today, if at all. SS also dictates that you give your baby 70 minutes to fuss and sort themselves out to see if they fall asleep on their own. If not, you go in and comfort them, change them and play for 20-30 minutes and then stick them back in that crib for another try at a nap. If, after another 70 minutes, they still don't give in, you then have a "nap emergency". In which case, you take them for a walk in the stroller or a drive in the car to get them to at least get *some* sleep before the next nap time.
[10:04am -- holy shit, he's quiet in there! 31 minutes of crying and then quiet... hmmm]
Anyway -- I didn't mean for this first post to be so long winded, but I had to get that background in there and explain the "plan". Next time, I'll try to keep it shorter!
[Edit:
9:33am - in crib
10:04 - asleep
10:31 - awake, crying
10:41 - went in to comfort
10:43 - in crib, crying]
A little background: Nolan will be 8 months old on November 22nd and other than the odd surprise nap or 6 hour stretch of night sleep, he has never been a good sleeper. I don't know why, but he has never responded well when I've tried to get him sleeping well. We did the "Cry it Out" method at 4 months old and because before that point, he would need to be bounced on the yoga ball to fall asleep and it would take for.ev.er to get him there. He would sleep exclusively in the swing and even that was beginning not to work anymore. So, CIO we did, and after a couple weeks, I could nurse him and put him in his crib without him crying and carrying on. So, getting him to bed became a lot easier, but he still woke up every 2-3 hours through the night.
After reading 'Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child' cover to cover several times, I have followed the methods to a 'T'. I've tried CIO for naps on several different occasions, giving it a good 2 weeks to get him to figure it out, and not once has it ever worked. Maybe Dr. Weissbluth's version of CIO for naps just doesn't work for this little dude. I've recently re-read 'Sleep Sense' which also uses a form of CIO, but the delivery is a little different. I'm going to try going with her method this time around.
So, here we are. Day 1.
Sleep Sense heavily suggests that you keep your baby in his crib for all naps during the training period so that they have a chance to figure out and realize that crib=sleep. It makes perfect sense to me and in a perfect world, that's what I would do, but I have two other kids who need to be dropped off and picked up from school and, as Murphy's Law states, prime nap times fall exactly during those drop offs and pick ups. So, I was going to wait to do this sleep training thing until Christmas break because the kids are off school for 2 weeks (TWO WEEKS?! WTF is that about?) this year and I wouldn't have to run around during nap times. But, after one more night of being up every 2 hours last night, I woke up this morning determined to just do the best I can and get things rolling TODAY. The lack of sleep and perma-grumpy baby around here is weighing on me heavily and I can't take it one more day, much less one more month until Break starts.
So, this morning I loaded up all three kids and dropped Mason off at school. Then we drove and drove to kill time (and try to get Nolan to nap - no dice) and then dropped Jaime at preschool. Nolan and I came straight home, nursed in the glider and I put him in his crib awake at 9:33am. It's now 9:59am and he's been crying the entire time. It kills me to hear him cry. Seriously grates on my nerves and makes me doubt myself every.single.time. We've got to power through this time though! This HAS to work. He HAS to learn that sleep and naps are a really good thing.
Sleep Sense (which will forever after be referred to as "SS" because I'm tired of typing it out already) allows for you to go in and check on your baby as often as you think he needs it. I haven't gone in yet because I think that my presence will just piss him off and make him cry harder. I don't think I'll tempt that fate today, if at all. SS also dictates that you give your baby 70 minutes to fuss and sort themselves out to see if they fall asleep on their own. If not, you go in and comfort them, change them and play for 20-30 minutes and then stick them back in that crib for another try at a nap. If, after another 70 minutes, they still don't give in, you then have a "nap emergency". In which case, you take them for a walk in the stroller or a drive in the car to get them to at least get *some* sleep before the next nap time.
[10:04am -- holy shit, he's quiet in there! 31 minutes of crying and then quiet... hmmm]
Anyway -- I didn't mean for this first post to be so long winded, but I had to get that background in there and explain the "plan". Next time, I'll try to keep it shorter!
[Edit:
9:33am - in crib
10:04 - asleep
10:31 - awake, crying
10:41 - went in to comfort
10:43 - in crib, crying]
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